10 Things The Sims Taught Jenn
There have been so many Sims games in my lifetime that I don’t think I can make one of these lists without including what this franchise has taught me. And man oh man, almost ten years of being a total Sims addict certainly has taught me a lot.
I guess no one ever taught THEM to use suncream
1. Humans in real life cannot, under any circumstance, spin-jump to get changed. All that will happen is that you’ll go flying into your dresser and probably crack your skull open. Trust me.
2. If you scream “shoo flee” at someone loud enough, they WILL leave you alone. After they report you to the insane asylum.
3. No matter how hard you try, you cannot win over real people by giving them bear hugs over and over. They will just smack you
4. I don’t see clowns when I’m sad, or bunnies when I’m lonely. In the real world, nothing fun happens when you are either of those two things. So suck it up.
5. Babies don’t come from kissing people. Thank GOD
6. You can’t get rid of your enemies by building walls around them, removing the doors to their house, or stuffing them in a room filled with only chairs and a fireplace.
7. Aliens do not impregnate you upon abduction in reality. They get to know you first.
8. Unlike in The Sims 3, ghosthunting is not a registered profession in the real world. You can’t just bust into people’s homes with a vacuum cleaner screaming “WHOEVER YOU WERE GONNA CALL IS HERE”
9. Maids don’t work for $10 an hour in Australia. And the ones that do, probably won’t even do a good job of cleaning your house, let alone sleeping with you.
10. Trying to “woohoo” in an elevator, change room, hot tub, shower or your child’s tree house will more than likely end in disaster. Under no circumstances do I recommend trying it.
